A Beautiful Bubble...Post 4

I have done more soul-searching in the past three and one half years than all the rest of my years put together. Our own experience with retrocochlear deafness / developmental delays / non-communication has brought me to my knees like nothing else.

And if nothing else, I have learned this. I NEED GOD'S GLASSES. Put another way, I need his perfect lens. :)

I need his perfect lens to help me peer inside of that beautiful bubble. To truly see what lies within.

I need his perfect lens to peel back the myriad of imperfect life layers so that I can snatch glimpses of what He so clearly sees every moment of every day.

I need to see through the mist and fog and sometimes torrential downpours of non-communication. I need more than rose colored glasses. I NEED GOD'S GLASSES. His perfect lens.

Sometimes I look at Quincie and I beam. My heart simply BURSTS with pride; so much so that I can hardly contain it. I love her sweetness, sparkle and shine. I love that she is content simply to be. I love that she is a dutiful daughter. I love her simplicity. I truly love her smile.

I love her contagious belly laughter. I love how she hugs me so ferociously that sometimes I think she will surely break through to sinew and bone. I LOVE MY BEAUTIFUL BUBBLE GIRL.

I marvel at this mostly silent warrior who has survived so much. Abandonment, orphanage, five surgeries in five years. All without complaint or ill will. Quincie doesn't hold grudges. She loves and lives wholeheartedly, even with reckless abandon.

Sometimes I wonder at my deep desire to Pop! this beautiful bubble of hers. Is it wrong of me? Am I ultimately doing her a disservice? In my holiest of moments I am proud simply to be the mama of a special needs child. I am grateful that I was given such a precious gift, a child that the world had abandoned. God's perfect lens. :) Post 4 of 7..